AuDHD and Illness
I’ve been sick this week — the kind of sick where everything slows down and even thinking feels heavy. My brain fogged over, my body ached, and suddenly the simplest things — brushing my teeth, checking messages, even deciding what to eat — felt impossible.
And of course, my AuDHD brain didn’t want to rest. It wanted to plan, analyze, do. But my body had other ideas. It demanded stillness.
Being autistic and ADHD means my nervous system is already doing extra work on a good day. When I get sick, that delicate balance between body, brain, and energy just falls apart. This week, I was reminded — again — that healing isn’t just about getting better. It’s about learning to rest, even when rest doesn’t come naturally.
🧠 Cognitive and Executive Function
When I’m sick, it’s like my brain’s operating system crashes. My executive function — the part that manages time, organization, and decision-making — just… stops responding.
Starting tasks feels impossible. Finishing them, laughable. Even small things like replying to a message can feel like climbing a mountain. My ADHD fog makes me forget what I was doing mid-thought, while my autistic brain demands order I can’t create.
Sometimes I end up hyperfocusing on researching remedies or tracking symptoms — convinced I can “fix it.” Other times, I stare into space, doing nothing, feeling guilty about it.
⚡ Sensory Sensitivities
Being sick makes my sensory system go haywire. Every noise feels too loud. The light too bright. Even my blanket feels wrong against my skin.
Other times, I can’t feel my body clearly at all — I forget to drink water or don’t notice hunger until I’m dizzy. My interoception (that inner sense of what’s happening in my body) goes out of sync, so I can’t trust my signals.
It’s disorienting. It makes me realize how much effort goes into simply being in a body when that body is sensitive to everything.
🗣️ Communication and Social Energy
When I’m sick, words don’t come easily. I go quiet — not out of avoidance, but because speaking or writing feels like too much work. My energy shifts to survival.
I can’t mask well when I’m unwell, either. My tone changes. My patience thins. I stop performing “okay.” And that’s probably a good thing — it’s honest. Illness strips away the mask that says “I’m fine,” and what’s left is the truth: I’m tired, and I need care.
❤️🩹 Emotional Regulation
Everything feels closer to the surface. I get frustrated faster. I’m not as steady as I want to be.
ADHD rejection sensitivity makes me worry I’m being a burden. My autistic side wants retreat and quiet. And honestly, both parts of me just want the world to stop asking for things until I feel like myself again.
So I let the emotions come and go without trying to analyze them (well, I try). Some days, that’s what emotional regulation looks like — not perfect calm, but honest permission.
🔥 When You’re Already Burned Out
Being sick on top of burnout is a whole different story. Burnout already feels like being stuck in low-power mode — your brain dimmed, your body heavy, your motivation gone.
When illness piles on top, it’s like your system gives up pretending. You can’t fake productivity. You can’t mask functionality. You’re just… done.
This week, I hit that point. And while part of me hated it, another part whispered something new: maybe this is what rest actually looks like. Not pretty, not planned, but necessary.
Burnout recovery isn’t spa days and self-care checklists. Sometimes it’s lying on the couch, body aching, letting dishes pile up, and deciding that this — this unglamorous stillness — is part of healing too.
💤 Energy, Routine, and Recovery
I love my routines. They make me feel safe. So when illness breaks them, I feel untethered. ADHD restlessness makes stillness hard, and my autistic brain craves structure I can’t maintain.
But this week, I tried something different. Instead of fighting my body, I listened to it. When it said sleep, I slept. When it said quiet, I put down the phone. When it said enough, I stopped pushing.
It wasn’t easy. But it was honest.
🌡️ Learning to Rest
Here’s what I’ve learned: when you’re sick, your body gets louder and your brain gets quieter. Your sensory system turns up the volume, while your executive function turns it down.
In short — your bandwidth shrinks, so every signal feels stronger.
And that’s okay. You’re not lazy or dramatic — you’re human, healing, and doing your best with a nervous system that already works overtime.
This week reminded me that recovery isn’t something you can rush. It’s a conversation between body and brain. And for those of us who live life at the edge of burnout, learning to rest might just be the hardest — and most important — skill of all.
AuDHDandBurnedOut 